SoulEclipse

20100209

Alex

I sometimes wonder if I offended Alex-niisan in some way. He was pretty vague in his expressions, except his immense hatred against Archie. He knew I was past it already but he's still very well blames Archie for what happened to him.

He wanted to kill him.

I just wanted to get out of the silence, I guess. I felt awkward though since I didn't want to just say *hugs* forever. I asked Juan about what he talks about with Pei, just to give me some ideas of topics to talk about.

It didn't end well. A lot of my topics went sour. I was hoping I could lift my brother's mood but, well, he managed to talk about a lot of bad things that had happened. Finally, he just snapped at me and declared his all out intent to kill Archie. I tried talking to him, but somehow, I can't help but feel that I seemed to have offended him at some point.

I was really feeling desperate to lift his spirit. In the end, I drew this for him via Windows Live Messenger.

We apologized to each other and when I need to sleep, we said our old goodnights. However, it felt like it was just a routine rather than our usual heartfelt goodnights.

It's still bugging me.

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